A married woman entered a Pharmacy, walked to the Pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes and said, “I would like to buy A FAST KILLING POISON FOR HUMANS”.
The bewildered Pharmacist asked, “why, what for?” The lady replied, “I need to poison my husband.” The Pharmacist shouted, “Lord have mercy, it’s against the law! It’s a sin.”
” Absolutely not,” shouted the lady. She reached into her bag and pulled out a picture of her husband in bed with the Pharmacist’s wife.
The pharmacist looked at the picture and screamed, “Why didn’t you tell me you had a Prescription!!!”
Ok. Picture this: Here I came to the library for some peace of mind, with the hope to revise my essay DUE IN A COUPLE DAYS. But, guess what? I can’t. Why? Because four ladies decided to turn the library into a conference room, so they can discuss their genealogy. Plus there is a DJ rehearsing his music for his graveyard shift tonight. Well, I’m guessing on this one.
But, don’t’ forget the guy sitting not too far from the ladies who is constantly burping. I mean, he burps so loud that one would think our Bldg was just crashed by a bomb.
Just about an hour here, now I can tell the loudest woman was married to a Jew, who lived in Germany. She washes her hair with some herbal plants. Her tub was leaking. She was in the army; she’s been 62… all her life… Although the doctors said she’ll never walk, but “That’s fine, I walk everywhere now!” Oh yes! She went back to work in October… and so on – and so on! Lord have mercy on me.
The second one: “Usually don’t follow doctor’s order…” Perhaps why she has enough time to listen to the tall german looking woman. The.other one sitting across her is Mexican descent. The third one is a bit quiet, but I think she claimed she’s been here all her life; possibly Indian bloodline and diabetic.
The.other one sitting across her is Mexican descent. The third one is a bit quiet, but I think she claimed she’s been here all her life; possibly Indian bloodline and she is diabetic.
Now the loudest among the four claimed “She wakes up at 5:00 A.M. in the morning. Then heads toward the kitchen to start boiling her egg – before she gets dressed…. No wonder she has so much time to disturb us here. OMG! She still going on!!!
By the way, when did the library became a conference room? I feel like screaming here:
OMG! Now she’s a cook, teaching the rest of the prospects chefs her culinary expertise – LOUDLY.
I give up! All that food talk is making me hungry.
Ok. So it’s about an hour and a half later. Now she’s sharing her “Femme sage” history during her delivery. WITH EXPLICIT DETAILS.
OMG! I will never have another child again!
Anyway, whoever said the library was supposed to be quiet?
Ok So now that I saved you guys a trip from the Library, enjoy the rest of the day. Going home to write my novel.
Sorry folks! I’ve been feeling a bit BLAHHHH lately, so my humor cup had to be replenished. But today, I thought I would just pay you guys a visit, just to say “Hello!”
Before I leave, let me share a couple quotes I read today. Just in case some of you might be faced with the same predicament. I don’t guarantee a permanent thrill, but at least, I hope it will be a sprinkle of light to sparkle your day ever for just a few seconds.
“Thinking, “Here goes nothing,” could be the start of everything.”
“Bad stuff happens. Sometimes it makes no sense at all. Sometimes it’s unfair. Sometimes, it just plain sucks. Bad stuff happens sometimes. Always remember that you have to move on somehow. You just pick your head up and stare at something beautiful like the sky, or the ocean, and you move the hell on.”
My answer? “Yeah right! Easy for you to say!”
Just kidding of course! In fact, after reading them, I felt much better. Well, at least for a second. That’s why I decided to soak myself in my blue tub. Well, as you may notice my room is still a mess, but at least it’s a good start.
In fact, I was encouraged by after I read them, at least for a few seconds. Afterward, I decided to soak myself in my blue tub. Well, as you may notice my room is still a mess, but at least it’s a good start. Don’t you think?
Ok. So she’s a caucasian woman, while I am and African American – Or should I say instead “I’m an African/Haïtian. Either way, so what? At least you got my grip!
Yes, this is muy latest painting. Hope you enjoy it!
And, “YES!” I’m feeling much better now; refreshed and ready for new challenges.
I once thought I was going to be a fashion designer. But life happened. But a couple days ago, while I was painting, it dawned on me, ” I can still follow my dream. I’m an artist, am I not?”
So, guess what? Going forward, I’ve decided to incorporate some of my fashion inspirations through my paintings. Check out the lady in blue with her head wrapped. By the way, I DESIGNED the shoes too. Well! I’m a shoe designer in progress, so don’t be too harsh on me.
The Title of this painting is “The Freedom To Express Yourself”
Yes, we are women, and we can make a bold statement even through our silence. Our style does define us at some level, don’t you think?
Waiting on your feedback!
Last week, two beautiful children graced my presence. They called me “My Mom’s friend Mother.” Isn’t that great?
Imagine while I was painting, the oldest boy sits right next to me, while he was conversing with his friend. And he would occasionally take a pick at my work to give me his feedback. His body language and verbiage would categorize him in the young entrepreneur section from an elite magazine. And, as if he was the gallery owner orchestrating my next art exposition, he would say,
“Maybe you should put a little sand over there by the lake, or “brush a little red over there!” I would smile.
The following morning, after he grabbed his chair to occupy his usual spot, he yelled,
“Wow! “Now, this should be in the museum!”
“From the mouth of the babe!” I thought. But, I quietly smiled before I thanked him. And, of course, as soon as his younger sister heard him, she ran inside the garage toward us.
(Whispering: “Don’t tell my daughter, but this is where I established my painting room before she kicks me out of her house.”)
Now, let’s get back to my story. After his young sister ran toward us, she, in turn, placed her left hand on her hip, while nodding her head she said, “Mm! Now this is a very nice painting!”
The expression on her face was simply to die for. While conversing with her, she always comes across as an old soul, with her mind way too brilliant for her tiny body. She’s just an adorable little creature, her knowledge surpassed her time. So, of course, I received both compliments with open arms. And, just about then I heard,
“Guess what?” It was her brother conversing with his friend on skype. He said,
“My Mom’s friend’s Mother is an artist, and I helped her polish one of her painting. “SO, WHEN SHE becomes famous, I’ll be famous too.”
I nodded my head to say, “You’ll go down in history as the young man who varnished my painting!”
“You heard that?” He said with excitement.
“Wow! Let me see her work.” His friend replied. The young boys face shunning like the moon in its full glory. So he asked me,
“My friend wants to see your painting, can I show him?”
“Hey!” I figured. “I have angels applauding my artwork, so why not enjoy the ride?” Anyway, in my opinion, whether one is an emerging artist such as myself, or as famous as Rembrandt, one should always applaud the children artistic enthusiasm?
So for me, it was an honor. A time, a moment I will cherish for the rest of my artistic career. And I do hope someday, perhaps, during a time, a moment, they too will have the opportunity to say “I remember her!”
Yes, I’ve been busy painting my heart out. And glad to report, “I’m finally stepping out from my comfort zone.” Therefore, I’m building my artist website, and showcasing my work in new horizons.
Although last month, my first priority was to complete my book, but somehow I ended up with a writer’s block.
Well, I did complete one book project for which I’m proud of. But I was just the ghostwriter. Bomber! Can you believe this? I wrote my heart out, but “THEY” will get the credit as the author.” But, what can I say? After I read the payment agreement, I swear it was a done deal!
“Half payment upfront” and “the balance paid upon completion.” Damn! I was so broke, I would have taken ten dollars upfront! After they sent me the contract, the first page I looked for was the payment agreement. Afterward, I was so busy writing that I couldn’t even find the time to broil my daily tea. Honestly, even my body had to plead for mercy, “Please, can you give me a bath?” To top it all, later on, while I was editing I found out I must have written some of the chapters in my sleep. Because in several times, I had to pause and asked myself, “Hold on! When did I write these pages?”
Yap! It took me less than a Month to write a novel. Hooray Nadege!
Ok! So what else I haven’t told you guys? I’m trying to keep you all posted about my borrowing life since we haven’t chat in a while.
Oh yes! If 2016 kills one more member of my family, I swear I will turn into an anti-year. I will shake her so hard, while I wring her neck that SHE’LL end up taking her own freaking life!!!
Can you believe this? In less than six Months I lost my brother, my father, and a little angel I called my niece. “Shame on you 2016!” (Deep breath.) “I had to get that out of the way before you read the following.”
Lastly, guess what? I had the nerve to request an appraisal for one of my abstract painting. And, after excruciating days of waiting, he gave me a “Five figures quote,” so I answered:
“When was the last time you went to see an Ophthalmologists? Would you mind if I pay for your next visit?”
Hah-hah-hah! I’m back!!!
My painting entitled ” The Circle of Life” The one below “Mom’s Provision.”