Month: April 2016
Since I started my blog here on WordPress I´ve discovered so many talented photographers whose work I love and give me daily inspiration. To this group especially belong Inese (Making Memories), Chris (Milford Street), Su (Zimmerbitch) and Emilio (Photos by Emilio
A dear friend of mine gave me her camera as a present because she wanted to buy a new and better one. That´s why I´ve been running around Berlin the last days, holding my “new” camera at the ready and hunted for motives I like.
Always being a huge fan of early photography I couldn´t resist and choose the sepia option;)
This shot was taken near where I live in Berlin.
Whenever you find yourself too busy to write a humor post for your blog fans, just take a few minutes to do your cultural ” Banda Dance” for them.
See? Now join me. I bet you’ll lose a few pounds.
Both of my cats Miko and Moina were placed to sleep today. I was forced to learn the meaning of the word euthanasia, and I will forever hate this word with a passion.
No, I’m not a happy camper. In fact, I’m so hurt, I feel like someone pulled off my guts while my head is constantly spinning. Although I keep convincing myself it’s merely a dream, however, whenever reality hits, I feel as if my cats were ripped apart from my chest, after being sliced and diced and carefully marinated with lime and hot pepper; I’m standing there watching their mutilated body, over and over.
Yes. My beautiful cats are now DEAD.
Sadly to say, I’m not the only one mourning for them. Two of my daughters were very close to them as well. In fact, they spoiled them and taught them tricks, even conversed with them as if…
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I took the liberty to help an elderly woman cross the street. She thanked me of course. But, just when I was ready to walk away I heard, “Can you see the church to my left?”
After a quick glimpse, I thought to myself, “If indeed there is a church nearby, I’m certain that only the letter “H” remains from the word church.”
“Are you sure you’re heading the right direction?” I asked the old lady.
“Of course I’m! Don’t think because I’m blind, I can’t tell where am going? I’m eighty-three years old, I still have all my brain cells left. Look carefully to my left again, the church should be right there.”
Thankfully, I didn’t’ have to look any further. An older frail looking caucasian man recognized my torn in the flesh.
“Church is over Larna, where you think you going?”
“Maybe for you, but ain’t over for me.” Then, as she turned her head toward me, she said, “Where are you. young lady?”
Like a lamb dragged to the slaughter, I answered back.
“Still here Larna.”
“Oh, you here!” She replied. As if we had formed an oral contract earlier.
As we walked toward the back alley, she remained quiet. So, for a cup of humor, I though I would encourage to talk.
“So, your name is Larna; beautiful name!”
“I was born LORNA, I’m not about to change my name NOW.”
“Oh! My apology.” Thank God, before she could utter another word, two young girls rushed toward her with open arms.
“Larna, you made it! Church is over but Mamma is still serving pastries.”
“Aren’t we glad to see you Larna; saved you your favorite cookies, come and sit down here.”
“And some coffee too?”
“Don’t forget the sugar.”
“Yes. Lots of sugar.” Afterward, the young woman pleasantly smiled, as she turned her attention to me for a cordial invitation.
But, something more interesting caught my attention. Norma was not eating. Instead, she was desperately rampaging her purse.
“Are you ok Norma?” The pastor asked her.
She swung her head around as if she had suddenly received the gift of sight. Then she said, “I don’t know what’s wrong with me today. I lost my pack of cigarette earlier, now I realized I left my marijuana bag at home. “You don’t happen to keep some in the church do you? ”
The pastor’s face including myself?
Quote Posted on
In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “A Mystery Wrapped in an Enigma.”
THE ENTER-VIEW PROCESS!
The word “interview” does not rhymes well with my senses. In fact, I get an allergic reaction, whenever I’m forced to travel through that intersection. Although I do understand this is a necessary process, but I can’t help it. I don’t know how to place my best foot forward. I always feel like saying: “Hey! You want me? Here I am! I’m a workaholic, and I have no time for game, or hypocrisy.”
Honestly, I have a phobia when it comes to talking to strangers. Yes, strangers tend to trigger my panic mode, no matter how friendly they appear to be. Therefore, sitting in a room filled with bullies, ready to intersect me, is not my ideal gourmet food.
The word interview itself makes me feel as if I’m willfully consenting for the oposing…
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My silence is temporary, so I’ll be BACK.
I’ve been very busy. If you don’t believe me check it out for yourself. Look at this bed of flowers I’ve been planting just for you!!!
Ok. So my nose is growing longer, and Pinocchio is thrilled. Yes, misery likes company. But, not for long; because I must go back to my sewing.
Yes, I did say “Sewing” and, I will share my French lace gown with you whenever I complete it.
Shh! Silence please!!! Im sewing it by hand so I need to concentrate.
Meanwhilei, enjoy the view.
My niece took me to a hot spot for some delicioso tacos last week. They were so tasty that I cordially invited myself back to their lobby yesterday.
But, after the young Mexican descent cashier said, “Ok, the toto is Dthirthy djuu Dolla.” I yelled back: “Thirty two dollars for what?”
“For dyour order.” He answered with a forceful smile.
“But, we only ordered six tacos and some drinks?”
“Yes. I know.” But it’s still Dthirthy djuu DOLLA!”
Although I highly admired his boldness, I was still outraged by the high cost. I’m talking about a fast food place, and, our order consisted of six dry corn tortilla layered with the smell of beef; sprinkled with diced onion and cilantro. But the spicy sauce does cry out: “Please keep eating ME and pay another $32.00 for six tacos.” But, regardless; in my opinion, I still felt it was a threat for bankruptcy.
Besides, since I wasn’t the one paying, I had to create some humor. That’s the least I could have done, don’t you think?
I did give my niece my heartfelt condolences for the death of her wallet, and promised to contribute for the funeral process.
Plus, I could tell the young cashier and I had a special connection. Yes, although his face was competing with the sunlight, while drops of sweats fell off like wax from a lit candle. However, humor was dripping off his hair, like black jell on weaves.
To prove my point, when he said “Dyou ordered Beef tacos which are more expensive than…”
I answered, “This cow better have been a saint with Jesus blood running through its veins.”
With enthusiasm he said: “Dsure was; it was shipped all the way from India!”
“Yes!” I thought. My kind of cashier!
What do you think?
This story is Friction or Non-Friction?
Or, could it be a blend of both?
While at the store, I noticed a handsome set of blue eyes staring at me from a distance. I could tell from his age range, he could still befriend a beautiful calendar, but that didn’ stop me from blushing anyway.
Hey, why should I care? Demi Moore did it! Besides, desperation plays an important role in a cougar’s lifestyle.
But I hate to burst your bubble. The fact is, while I was fantasizing, “How sexy I would look wearing my little black dress on my first date.” A lioness decided to block my view.
I was abruptly awakened when I heard.
“Oh my God! You look just like Gando’s grand-daughter!”
After I rolled up my eyes to signal to her “How I wished she would buzz off;” with a fake smile masking my face, I forced myself to answer back.
“And you must be from?”
Thank God she interrupted me. I was about to say “From hell.” But she beat me to it. Except, she used a much familiar version.
“Yes, I’m from Haiti.”
“Yes.” I said while shaking my head. “I can see the large “H” on your forehead.
Of course, she didn’t get my point. In fact, she thought I was joking.
Yes. My people are everywhere. Do you recalled when David asked God: “Where can I flee from Your presence?” It would be ironic to ask my fellow Haitian that question.
I bet you one of them might be working all the way in the Republic of China, as a security guard for Xi Jinping.
What worse, my crush could practically hear everything she was saying.
“You used to pi in bed when you were a little girl, do you remember that?” She asked me.
This is when I appreciate my skin tone being on the darker side. Otherwise, at this point, one could have easily mistaken me for a pile of plum tomatoes. And, before I could answer her back, I noticed my crush took one step closer toward us.
I blushed some more before I answered, “Yes, I do remember. In fact, I invented the word “Bathtub” How could I forget?
“Oh my God!” She yelled. “You are so funny. Do you still bite your nails too?”
By then, the young Siberian husky with the blue eyes was glued next to me. I guess he was amused by my embarrassment. So, while he was smiling, I was in tears.
I forced myself to take a deep breath before I answered the messenger from hell.
“Bite my nails? In fact for my girls manicure, I recalled when they were younger, there were no need for a nail clipper.”
By then she was laughing so hard, she had teary eyes. When she finally stop laughing, she said.
“Commère sure would have been thrilled to see you again.”
“Commère? I don’t remember her, who is she?” I asked her.
“Oh! She was the neighbor who use to talk about you. She passed away when I was twelve.”
P.S. BEWARE – This is a fiction story.
Hahahaha! I bet you thought it really happened!
My Beautiful people.
The painting is from another artist.
Passionate living, what are your secrets?
“Wake up early
Greet your Creator
Inhale the fresh air
Bathe in the sunrise
Smell the roses
“Smile, while you create something BEAUTIFUL.”
Dedicated to my sister Elsie Moïse. I love you Sis!