“Mighty Good Mood!”

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I saw an angel today. He was pissing in my back yard. And, since I was in a mighty good mood, I just asked him;

“Hey! What your do-yin?”

He replied,

“Non’ of your business!”

He pissed me off.

So I replied,

    “Look ATOLLA JELLYFISH, don’t you dare get smart with me, OK!”      atolla jellyfish

He answered,

“And, you VAMPIRE SQUID, you better buzz off!!!”

I don’t know what was wrong with him?

“Perhaps a bad day?”  I asked him.

He just stood there staring at me.

I found myself so angry at him that, I plucked off some of his feathers. But, I soon lived to regret it.

angels feathers

He grabbed my hands, and swung my body above his head, like a weightless dry leave.

Drowning’ down the lake behind him, I started screamin’

 “HELP! HELP!”

Then, he smoothly turned around and smiled. Effortlessly, he rescued me at the blink of an eye.

So I said,

  “Now that I see you close, you sure are lookin’ good!”

He answered,

“Of course! I just saved your butt, so now you’re flattering ME!”

“Oh please!   You wingless giant; weren’t you just doin’ your JOB!!!”

He immediately turned himself into A FIRE BUSH, and scared the hell out of me.

Furthermore, he grabbed me by my legs this time as he was ready to use me like a tennis ball.

That’s when I yelled,

“Ahh-AHH! “Ok! I take it back!”

When he dropped me back, I bounced like a ping pong ball. Trust me.

Then he answered me in creole,

“Ou ti madichon, m’pral palé papa’w pou ou!”

“Hold on! ” I yelled. “You do speak English, don’t you?”

“And?” He replied with an attitude.

Translation:

   “You little curse child, Gon-na tell your Pap on you!”

So  I chucked. I wasn’t scared of HIM!

And, while I nod my head, with my hands on my hips;

I answered,

“Well, you sure ain’t the first, and certainly will not be the last!”

The feather giant got so angry, that after he glued my lips, He left me hanging on a tree.

So, I mmmmed,

“MmMmMm! MmMmMm! MmMmMm!”

He answered in creole,

Ou ti madichon, map kité bouda’w pandyé!!!”

Translation,

“You little curse child, I’m leaving your butt hanging!”

This time ,  he really  meant it.

 So, finally, when I realized I was doomed, I begin to stump on the tree branches, till I fell down directly on his head.

To my surprise, my lips were instantly unglued. So I immediately grabbed a hold of his neck, start choking the life out of him.

While I yelled,

   “Bless me before you go! Bless me before you go!     Just like you did to Jacob!”

When he tried to grab a hold of my hip, I rolled over his back and start plucking off his feathers.

Then I yelled again,

   “Bless me like you did Jacob! Bless me before you go”

He was so annoyed, of course! But, did I care?

“Of course not!”

So before he flew away he finally answered me in creole again.

“Sou tè sa ou pral viv pasé santèn; nou pa bezwen ti madichon nan syèl la!!!”

“Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!”  I yelled while leaping for joy.

Then, I stopped.

“Hold on! What did he saiy?

Translation:

“On this earth, you live to be over a hundred years old.    Because heaven is reluctant to welcome the curse ones!”

The end.

 

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