No wonder Halloween is celebrated in October – This is the Month when the witches show their true colors!!!
PARENTS, I FEEL YOUR PAIN.
Trust me on this one. I gave birth to four witches!!!
Honestly, I strongly believe my third daughter must have been the ruler of hell during her past life.
And, I must have been her partner!!!
God’s sense of humor never cease to amaze me!
My sister, niece, including one of my daughters, were all waiting for the arrival of my siblings, who are Jehovah Witnesses. As I wrote in my previous post, they were on their way to see our father. As for me, I was seating on the dining room table with my PC open on a blank page, waiting to capture this historic encounter for my humor blog.
But I must tell you, my daughter was still in denial. She refuses to believe my siblings would not speak to me because I previously renounced the Jehovah witness teachings after nearly four years studying with them.
“Mom, I know Tatie (auntie) and uncle would never stop talking to you because of that. So today if you talk to them, I’m sure they will answer you.”
“No Cassie, the perfectionist fake Christians think I’m the offspring of Satan, therefore they are forbidden to speak to me.“
The last conversation my brother and I had after he was ordained to be an elder. He told me “contrary to the ordinary members, as an elder now, he had the authority to talk to me, only with the hope to rescue my soul.”
I answered him “If you think you have the right to judge me as a repulsive soul, the authority you think you have must be hidden inside your pants, preferably inside your shithole!”
“I’m an ordained Elder from the J.W. organization, so yes I have the authority!” He replied proudly.”
I was annoyed by his arrogance. “Oh yeah! Your authority came from men, and not of God, now Am I obliged to listen to you, so take a hike!”
After a brief silence, he said: “Well, apparently you are listening to all the other preachers. As you know, Satan is the God of this world, and all the other religions who are teaching heaven as their final destination are under his jurisdiction. So you just chose your own destruction.”
“Yes brother! And YOU the Jehovah Witnesses are the freaking lowest level souls, who know nothing about love or charity, compassion or forgiveness. You destroy family ties, even moral values and tradition through your false teachings. You aim to take from the world while giving nothing in return. It’s a good thing your hope being earthbound for eternity, so all of heaven SHIT will be falling on you guys! Great reason for us to add cabbage to our daily meal!”
I’ve been waiting for YOU to show up. Hell YOU!
“Excuse you, but I’m not ‘Hell or YOU” My name is DESTINY.”
“I know who you are, and I’m furious at you – Look at my life! In fact, let me start talking, because I need to unload my chest.”
“OK. Now that I’ve removed the knife from the counter, you don’t happen to have a gun, do you?”
“Of course not! I may be furious, but I’m not a murderer!”
“They all say that dear – Please, do continue.”
“Ok. How come there are doctors, nurses, engineers, nutritionist, attorneys, teachers, artist, chef, even a con-artist in my family. I’ve been told everyone has a destiny. But I’m fifty plus years old, and still yet to discover mine. Who the hell am I supposed to be?”
“How the hell should I know? I’m not your “Maker!” If I were you, I would just pick one missing from the list you just mentioned.”
“What? What kind of answer is this? You are not helping me!”
“I don’t recall greeting you with “May I help you?” In fact, when I showed up, I DID SAY “Peekaboo,” didn’t I? Now you see me, now you don’t!”
“What’s that supposed to mean? If you are my destiny, you are supposed to know that at least.”
“Oh dear! I’m everyone’s DESTINY. This is my name, remember?”
“So, you should know my faith!”
“Oh no dear. This is between you and your Maker, I don’t meddle in the mater of religion.”
“Religion? Who said anything about religion?”
“You just mentioned faith didn’t you? Or did you mean to say “fate?”
I’m talking about my destiny, so of course I meant to say fate.”
“Oh honey, you need to learn how to spell then.”
“OMG! Are you FOR REAL?”
“Oh dear, rage won’t’ help you either!”
“DESTINY, I need some answers from you. SO STOP IT!”
Honey, I don’t have the answers you are seeking. I’m DESTINY, therefore I’m in the future, not the present. But I guarantee you: If you search deep within, you will discover the answers which you are seeking, along with all the tools you will need, for your journey. Then, only one thing will be left for you to do: Just learn how to use them. For these tools were given to you, so they may guide you through every steps, till you reach your destined path. But, I guarantee you, if you step up forward, through the road of resilience, make a right turn. Then cross the valleys, and climbs up the hills ahead. Remember, no matter how many times you will stumble and fall, you must force yourself to get up, and keep moving forward. Because, after you’ve defeated your demons, and, at the mountaintop of victory, right there, at the appointed time; I will be standing waiting for you.”
“You cheater! You only show up at the end!”
“Wouldn’t you? I’m DESTINY. I cannot afford to get dirty!”
You think life would feel content with me just waking up this morning? Of course Not! I don’t know why you are called life when you are squeezing the life out of me! You should be called ‘death, and not life!”
-“I’m freaking tired, of you freaking wrongly accusing me, whenever you are freaking having a bad day!”
“Wow! LIFE, You must be having a bad day too!”
“What do you think? Let’s exchange post for just an hour! I bet, you wouldn’t last one minute!”
“Oh please, you are “LIFE” for God’s sake, how bad could it be?“
“HOW BAD? Are you serious?”
“Jesus! You sound like you are having your menstruation…just like a woman!”
“This is an everyday thing for me Nadege. Remember, I’m LIFE. Blood has to pump out of me EVERY SINGLE DAY! And you people don’t make it any easier either. I’ve been called every name in the book, and I’m TI-RED of it!”
“So, are you confirming being a female? I’ve often wondered about that!”
“Thou! You think God would give this tremendous responsibility to a male? No dear. WE, the female, carry all the load, although the male are viewed as the strong one. Yes, we carry the babies, (male and female) breast- feed them, clean the house, cook dinner, and don’t’ forget both jobs, in the bedroom and the office. While most of the male – will wear a suit, a tie, carry a briefcase, have a meeting; then come home to say: “Hew – It’s been a long day honey!”
“You nailed it LIFE. That’s the damn LIFE we have here on earth!”
“YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN? Why do you have to blame ME? You guys not only called me the “B” word when I’m not even allowed to flirt with a man. Furthermore, I get the blame for every single thing that goes wrong in your life. Do you know how often you guys say: “That’s LIFE! – LIFE is a B!” -I AM Fed UP!!!”
But, I thought you just claimed you were “LIFE? Why are you calling yourself “Fed UP?”
“No. I said, “I – Am-fed –up with you guys blaming me for everything wrong in YOUR LIFE!!!”
“Boy! You have it bad this month, hen? Is there a pill you can take for this anger you’re feeling – because my ears drums are about to burst from YOUR SCREAMING SO LOUD! Damn it! “Remember, I started with a bad day too – Gosh!”
“LISTEN to me you ungrateful species: “ I dropped by to tell you: “I’m “LIFE.” I am paired with tremendous possibilities. I keep company with Inspiration and imagination for you guys sake. I call opportunities to your door steps, and all you have to do is to cease the moment. Although, for my amusement, there are times when they come in disguise. Nevertheless, they are yours to explore. Laughter, humor, pleasant memories, good health, and even gratitude, are all under my jurisdiction. Talents and self-exploration, are my special treats to you. My aura is nothing but light. Yes, I’m covered with the stars during the night, and the sun pave the way for me in the morning, yet not even darkness can blur me from your sight. So why do you guys persist on blaming me – calling my name whenever you are plagued with a challenge from darkness kemp?”
“Hell – Low! Did someone called my name?”
To be continued.